This morning getting out of bed was quite difficult! I was sore, tired and emotional. Not quite sure what all was going on but with the help of a loving husband, I made it to church by 7:30am to practice for the early service. I was leading music with arguably the most talented musicians we have at our church. I have to confess, I struggled with (C). I know I was tired, I know I was emotional, but I also know I struggle with feeling like I am a second rate singer/musician. This morning I tried to set it down, to let go and just focus on praising God, but it was a struggle. I have not been singing much and it was not smooth or easy. The good news is that God is willing to take our imperfection as beautiful praise. It was a huge blessing to sing with Didi, Sam and Carolyn. It was a blessing to worship God with my church family. There were many blessings, I just wish I had been able to worship without worrying about the (C). If nothing else I am determined to continue surrendering to God and letting him take this life and clean it! I am looking forward to the day when I can sing with these amazing musicians and not be thinking about keeping up, but thinking about looking up! After all it should never be about me, what I do or don't do, but about praising! Again, the good news is God blessed in a mighty way, not only the music, but the entire service. To Sam, Didi and Carolyn, it was an honor!
Then Gary Moyer preached an amazing powerful sermon about.... what else.... the importance of relationships! The importance of living in harmony and pursuing peace. It was a beautiful reminder to work on really loving each other and letting go of self. I was blessed! Then as we were leaving I was able to hold Ian and make him laugh! (Ian- Sam and Didi's son) There is nothing as precious as a laughing baby!
Then home for a delicious lunch, fire in the fire place and a very long uninterrupted sabbath afternoon nap. It was such an incredible nap, I can't begin to tell you. Then Chris and I went out to dinner with another couple from our church. It was a fun date night.
Tonight finds me trying to accept my musical limitations, to find the truth.... without (C)! To remember that God does not need perfection, he just needs us to be willing.
Tonight finds me thankful that I am in a relationship with a God who is patient with me and understands this process better than me. I am thankful that today he could take me, riddled with (C), and still make something beautiful! Oh what a God we serve! Oh what a blessing the relationship is!
1 comment:
I was truly blessed by the service and praise music. God continues to tell us to love one another, yet some want to focus on... the Last days... well (yesterday) was my last day of January 14, 2012.. and it was wonderful. You Beth, my friend was part of the day that was wonderful! PS I did have baby envy when I saw you with Happy Ian... since I was only able to make him cry the night before.... just kidding! Love to you and all that read this blog!
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