Thursday, January 5, 2012

Day 104- Reflecting and Refocusing

 I looked back at Day 3, and found this list.  It has nothing about getting thin,  it has nothing about loosing lots of weight.  It is about learning to be healthy, and that is it!
I am trying to get refocused by looking back at where I have been, where I wanted to go and how I am coming.  I don't need to worry about the pounds but the quality and the health of what I am putting in my body. 

1.  Fresh food
2. Vegetarian
3. Food must be colorful
4. Keep food as much in its natural form as possible
5. High calorie food must be high quality (desserts should be homemade with good ingredients etc.)
6. Eating out...pay more eat less ( make sure to eat in quality places)
7. When eating what others have prepared for you... JUST EAT and enjoy!
8. Sit down, and toast! (make the meal an experience, light candles, enjoy conversation!)
9. Whole grains
10. Don't eat fake sweeteners or fats.



Along the same lines, I have been very discouraged about the running. (Or the lack of running)  I have been just depressed and feeling defeated about it! Every time I have gone recently it has just been bad.  I am dying after 3 miles and I can't seem to increase speed and I am barely keeping pace at a 16 minute mile. Today I spent quite a bit of time looking at the process of the race, thinking about things like drinking, peeing etc. and frankly dreading it, feeling like it isn't possible and this is going to be the most humiliating experience. Then tonight I stopped in the church to look at decorations for the Agape feast I am working on and Susan asked me about how training was going.  I gave her a quick and flippant comment hoping that it would go no further.  But she wouldn't let it go.  I finally got very honest and told her exactly how terrible it is going.  She then started asking me lots of questions.  (For those of you who don't know Susan she is marathon runner)  To make a long story short, she was so encouraging and frankly helped me break down what I am doing and has made several suggestions to try.  One of which is to slow down!!! Go figure!!! Looking at the stats in my phone, she deducted that my runs are way to fast, making the walk portion a painful recovery.  Her suggestion is slow way down on the run and then try running longer.  Essentially get my run and walk times closer together.  She also talked about my hydration, and nutrition and discovered that I am running dehydrated and void of sugar.  I tried to joke about this body having plenty of energy to pull from and she ignored my stupid fat girl jokes and stayed serious.  It was a wonderful God send conversation and I can't wait to go running!  I look forward to trying some tricks, to finding a comfort in this process. To working on what works for me and not worrying about what everyone else is doing! 



Today I am excited about all that has taken place and look forward to tomorrow.  


I also read my first devotional from Born to Crave and it was wonderful!  I appreciated the reminder to crave my Savior.  I am encouraged. 


Tonight I am setting down the Crap of fat girl jokes!  I must stop!!!!


Tonight I am setting down the Crap that tells me I can't.


Tonight I am setting down the Crap telling me I am not worth nutritious and delicious food.

Tonight I am setting down the Crap that says food comforts me better than Christ!

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